fruits are a confused bunch

I am digging into the deepest trenches of my heart
to see, what am I actually feeling
to see, what it actually desires
to see, why is it so confused
a mix of indifference, doubts and excitement
is so eclectic, that spins different flavours all the time

I can only imagine...
so timid to do anything
and by your act of exclusion
I will just be even more sour.